Don’t Miss What’s possible

Don’t Miss What’s possible

When the world is your oyster

With Relocation can do anything!  You can create a new life and redesign it to whatever you would like…however you would like to live.

Doesn’t that sound AMAZING? Like a glorious wonderful life designed by a fairy godmother or genie.

Like winning the lottery.  All financial problems solved and so is life?

Whatever exists before, most likely continues on.

The ironic thing about winning the lottery is that many of the winners, even with all that money and all the possibility that comes with it, these winners still lived life by the same rules and in the same way as before receiving the money.  Sure, many pay off debt, but they also continue to make financial decisions using the pre-winning rules.  Statics show that within 5 years it is all gone and many are back in debt.

Why because life is typically lived one way.  A cash windfall or a relocation to a new community doesn’t change personal values, how money is managed or what we choose to do.  It doesn’t change our attitudes politically or our charitable passions.  Whatever exists before, most likely continues on.

A lack of significant change in life follows many assignees and their families as they relocate across the country or around the world.  Whatever life looked like before, it is most comfortable to reset life as close to what it was as possible.

Stay the Course!

Naturally, this leads us back to more of the same understand different flag.

This is what we do as humans.  Our brains naturally seek what is known in the midst of chaos.  This is because it is known.  Even when the life may have been painful or unfulfilling it is known and that provides a level of comfort and draws even the most adventurous of us in.

Because of this we do not see the possibilities.  We do not see those things that are different, not in a way that they become options for us.  When we relocate it is like we are starting back down on the lowest level of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.  Our primitive brains do not want to try anything new until we are safe, have housing and are sustained.

Naturally, this leads us back to more of the same understand different flag.

Breaking Free

It takes effort to break free of the comfortable.  It takes a choice.

Choice is something we humans tend to avoid, because of the lack of comfort and the perception of risk.  The good thing about this is that most choices only have a perception of risk and if we really play it out, the risk is much less risky than our brains have told us it is.

In normal life, one without relocation, that risk seems enormous.  We could lose our friends.  We could be isolated.  We might have to try new activities or groups.  We could lose our job.

Ironically, relocation has cause all of this by arriving in a new location. A clean slate if you will…free of or simple without.  In the new community it is literally a place from which everything must be chosen.  So more of the same of something new.

So Now What?

Uncomfortable in some measure greets every day until we re-establish our life…our normal.

So again, now what?

This is the opportunity.  We are uncomfortable either way. Once we have uprooted all and are working to settle in the new location, this is the time to remember this as an opportunity.  Pausing long enough see this with open eyes, we will begin to see now only our options but the ones in the place where we have landed.

It is normal to automatically seek out the known in order to create calm.  Putting the kids in soccer teams.  Weekend trips to the beach.  Date nights every Thursday.  Whatever was done before, just the thought of that can bring a substantial level of comfort.  Comfort brings peace, peace in relocation days that are filled with more chaos than peace.

However, what if, instead of seeking what was known, what posed a question…

What could I do here that I have never done before? 

Ask and Receive

The brain loves direction.  Asking it a direct question is the best way to receive answers. 

  • What else is here?
  • What am I not seeing?
  • How could this benefit my family?

Want to challenge this?  What happened the last time someone you know thought, “Why can’t I do that?”  I guarantee their brain went to town and provide many, many reasons why it couldn’t.  And ultimately decided it can’t be done.

Asking the brain, “What could I do?” earnestly, and with curiosity, this question sends the brain seeking options. 

With the brain directed, all sorts of options begin to pop up.  The funny thing is that these options were always there. However, because the brain was not looking for anything beyond what was known…these new options could not be seen.

Expectation pulls the curtain back

It makes sense, doesn’t it?  When we are focused on something, it appears everywhere.  Like buying a new car and now seen at every intersection it appears that everyone had the same idea.

When we see all the options we can make choices rather than simply missing out.

When we pull back the curtain, the curtain/belief that binds us to seeing only one or perhaps just a few options, when that is pulled back, we all begin seeing.

We look again, this time believing that we will find something new, something that will entertaining us or useful to us.  Options flood forward.  Perhaps the kids enroll in a local school with an amazing STEM program.  You join a local trekking club joined while in Europe.  Traveling weekends are planned to see the area pueblos and Indian reservations in the American Southwest.  The entire house or flat is covered in Spanish words on post it notes so that the whole family learns the local language, together.

When we pull back the curtain and really see what is possible that is when our own minds open up to even more.

When we see all the options, we can make choices rather than simply, missing out.                                                                                                                 

One step further

On Thursday’s podcast I talk about Dr. Ute Limacher-Reibold, an international language consultant and  trainer, and how she helps her clients open up to really see the world in front of us.  Many times we marvel at the ease in which children change and adapt to new environments and circumstances.

Want to relocate well?
I can help.

Download  “a Sense of Home” guide

The journey is easy.  Begin here.


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