Power of purpose...unless lost

Power of Purpose…unless lost

Finding within ourselves what we may not know is there.

What is your purpose?  For many of us, we think of it as…

Who do I want to be when I grow up?

However, purpose…your personal purpose is bigger than that.

It is bigger than a profession or an occupation.  Because purpose weaves through all of those.  It may change along the way, but purpose is not something that is bound by a single aspect of life.

Whether you believe that purpose is divinely given or born out of passion, our innate personal purpose drives what we do and who we are.  It comes from within and shines a light on the external that aligns with us.  It is like a beacon in the night “come here” or “this is for you”.

The funny thing about purpose is that some people are keenly aware of their purpose while others can’t quite define it.  I believe it is always part of us and our lives reflect it, however some of us like me, did not seek it out.  I thought purpose was for other people.  I was busy building a life.  I was busy doing what I “should” do.

I know now, I had purpose and it centered on many of my values and passions.  But I did not see my purpose and that led to a disjointed and haphazard life..

But here as an adult with no one to tell me the way things were done around here, it was all up to me and I had no idea.

My life centered on others and the community shoulds.  I was a cog in my own life, bending to what the “others” needed, asked or expected.  It was a good life and some of it aligned with my purpose.  However, my life was full of more trial and more error because I did not direct my life aligned with my purpose.

And then relocation as an adult happened.

Once I relocated for the first time as an adult, that sense of purpose was no longer determined by my family, friends and location.  When I was a kid it was just laid out for me.

But here as an adult with no one to tell me the way things were done around here, it was all up to me and I had no idea.

Relocation lays bare Your Purpose

Relocation brings personal purpose, front and center.

On the other end of relocation, when boxes are mostly emptied, the kids have a routine and the weekend family is set, I looked at what I had created and realized my life still lacked…well, life.  I began to meet people and do things but there was something missing. 

Bringing in similar things and creating a similar daily wasn’t enough.  Yes, I was feeling good after 45 minutes of cardio, but I did not get out of that class that I always did back in Chanhassen.

So, lets take out the starvation and find fastest way to fill our purpose by discovering and defining it.

The misconception is that people, activities and a place are what causes a lack of purpose.  We do grieve each of these in their absence, however it is the elimination of these things that expose our unfed personal purpose. 

Personal purpose is fed by what we do, who we bring in and where we live.  But it is more than than a person, an activity and a place.  This is because what and who we brought in before fed our personal purpose.  When we don’t know what our personal purpose is…it take trial error and a bit of starvation to put life back on track.

So, lets take out the starvation and find fastest way to fill our purpose by discovering and defining it.

Channeling “Indiana Jones”

Discovering and defining personal purpose begins where we “feel” it.

Try on this belief. “I know my purpose instinctually.”

 How will you prove this? Think about the last time you through “this isn’t right or easy”. Think about a time when you were stuck and couldn’t quite get everything to make sense.  Those signify non-alignments in our lives. We catch a glimpse of why it doesn’t align, but it is fleeting because they come with uncomfortable emotions that many of us push away.

The questions and the unease though demonstrate the existence of purpose.  Use those feelings to lead you to your purpose.

These feelings may be:

  • Uncomfortable
  • Isolated
  • Frustration
  • Overwhelm

Get creative and be brave about seeing these feelings and allowing them to stay for a bit. They are there to show you a misalignment between what you are doing and your purpose.  Seeing the misalignment alerts you where to look to find what is most important to you.

Ask yourself:

  • What is it about that “thing” that doesn’t work?
  • What doesn’t it provide you?
  • What were you expecting it to do or provide?
  • How were you expecting to contribute and create?
  • What was it about her beyond what we did that created connection?

For example, when I am isolated I know that I am not interacting with enough people.  Now that might seem obvious, but it isn’t as straight forward as seeing people or having a quick chat.

For me I am fulfilled when I have interesting conversations where I learn something or perhaps, I uniquely contribute to someone else.  Seeing the drive through barista Starbuck only helps for a moment.  What I want to do is connect.

Through many iterations of this, I defined my purpose: To create love, joy and connection.

I use this now to evaluate the communities, people I am hiring or considering as friends, and activities.  I know the “right” group for me will include an opportunity to do these three things.  When supporting KickStart Kids (one of my favorite charities) I participate not only because it dramatically impacts what is important to me, but alongside that my participation provides an opportunity for me to create love, joy and connection.

When I marry the two I have more energy, creativity and drive.

Purpose and Grounding

Grounding is the most significant benefit in knowing our personal purpose.

This makes every decision easier.

When we actively live within our personal purpose, it provides a solid place to step off from.  We use our purpose to determine where to go next.  With it we can more easily determine if this person is a good potential friend.  We also confident when chose to not move forward with an activity community or a person.

Grounding in our purpose gives us the place where we rarely second guess ourselves or our decisions.  We exist in a place where we believe that the decision we made, was the best we could make at that time.  Through experience we may choose differently the next time, but that decision was purpose based and provided a learning from which we adjust going forward.

This makes every decision easier.

When is the last time you felt truly grounded?

If it has been a while… it may be time to search and see those mis-alignments and find those breadcrumbs that lead to your individual purpose.

Help finding my purpose

If this sounds interesting but you’d like deeper conversation, I am available.

Click the “Let’s Chat” button in the upper right hand corner and choose a time that works for you.  We will explore your mis-alignments bravely to begin defining Your Personal Purpose.  The best part is trying out WholeLife Relocation Coaching, is on me.

Have a wonderful week!

Want to learn more about relocating well?
I can help.

Download  “a Sense of Home” guide

The journey is easy.  Begin here.

Links from Podcast:
ReloWomen Live: An Interview with Juanita Brown Ingram

Juanita Ingram LinkedIN 
The Expats: International Ingrams on Facebook

STREAM The Expats: International Ingrams on Prime Video Click Here

Watch the Interview with Juanita Ingram Click Here

Lynn Greenberg, Pivt and LinkedIN

Lindy Chapman, CEO DOSS Social and LinkedIN


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