Creating your own community group allows you to do what you love while meeting people who share your enthusiasm and passion. Here are a few simple steps and friendly communities to plant your group in.Continue reading
The New Normal. What is that?
So many changes & so many differences, normal after relocation can seem unattainable.
Interestingly, our brains are always looking to create normal through shortcuts. It does this in the background or even unconscious to conserve energy for the next fight or famine. See The Power of Habit, by Charles Duhigg.
Do you want what comes without choice?
I challenge you to slow down during the first few months to choose not just fall into your new normal.
CHOOSING YOUR NORMAL
With the clean slate of relocation, ask yourself…Do you want life to be like it was? …OR is it time to bring in some new and toss some old?
Most times, what we do is not by choice. We do things because of who we know, their values and what they choose. Whether a friend, parent or authority figure, going along with their choices, interests or values is the easiest path to connections and a daily routine.
Though easy, these activities and people may not support your values and how your family wants to live.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
→Want to try Yoga?
→How about a more creative workplace?
→Think your kids should try Awanas or Scouting?
→Are you really a minimalist, a gypsy or sailor?
→Would homeschooling for a year allow the whole family a Japanese adventure?
→WHO do you and your family want to be???
Dig down and imagine a life without the shoulds and coulds of the previous place. Push aside the assumed or real judgement of others and design life.
NO MORE SHEEP ~
Live here, buy that, do this! All clamoring for your attention ~ media, family, friends and “accepted” rules/norms and then judging any deviation, it’s amazing any of us live outside of the 1.86 children, 1 dog, white picket fence house.
Some choose this. And you can too…but you don’t have to.
DEFINING OUR VALUES
There are few times in life where we have the empty space to create a life.
Being physically separated from who we know, the culture we know, the rules we use and the traditions and habits we participate in, gives us that empty space. This is the time sift all that we have been doing.
What is liked and valued?
Name what propels you forward? And sucks the life out?
When life felt as big and as wonderful as it could be,
Who were we with, what were we doing, who were we blessing?
Types of friends encourages us to be who we are?
What or who told or implied we were not good enough?
It is how we feel about our experiences that help us to verbalizes what we value.
See the NEW Normal worksheet for examples of core values.
Where you sleep at night, what you do and who you are with, that defines home.
Home noun \ˈhōm\ :1. Place of Residence. 2. Social unit formed
by living together. 3. familiar or usual setting. Merriam Webster
What works for your family? Who are you?
* A loft downtown with artsy friends, weekly cocktail parties and selling party art.
* A sailboat in the Caribbean with Fluffy and a captain going from island to island giving lectures on organic farming.
* Backpacking with a travel journal, your family and wherever you lay your head every night.
* Two and a half acres in the country where the kids can be raised without big city distractions and taught to hunt.
The point is to personally define home.
How, when, where and with whom
Home is built upon the activities participated in, the supportive people allowed in, and the physical home recharged in. The structure is ultimately a single cog that supports how you live, not the definition.
THE END GAME ~ Your New Normal
Now THIS is home!
The Primary GOAL of ReloMoms is to help you create home wherever you land.
By taking time to create and know your normal, it is something that you can take with you and your relocation adventures wherever you go.
Take some time and use the link worksheet to define your new normal:
And ultimately living Your definition of HOME.
Craft your NEW Normal with this week’s worksheet
If you have any suggestions to help others please email me at Annette@ReloMoms.com. Together we live great Relo Lives!!
A ReloMom currently in the wilds of Texas, working to encourage and inspire others while seeking another adventure.
Not the tourist stuff…yet.
It is so easy to find and yet, the Arch in St. Louis, the Coca Cola museum in Atlanta or the Longhorns in Fort Worth… those are for the tourists, and your friends and family to when they visit. This is about finding things to do in your new town.
You need to start where the real people are. The people who will make up your everyday community.
Therefore, turn to the real people: your neighbors, your kids friend’s parents and work colleagues are at the local hangouts. These are tried and true tested events, businesses and places they go to with their family and friends. Comfortable and engaging, they are places and events where you can settle in, like you live here.
WHAT DO YOU DO FOR FUN?
Since this depends on what YOU like to DO, let’s start with MUSIC.
Music plays a big part in most people’s lives. After years of living through bitter cold winters of Minnesota, my family loves being outside. With months of indoor hibernation, we crave star lit evenings with a breeze and a band in the background. Now in the south, we be outside most of the year.
IMAGINE your favorite Music space. Perhaps a version of it is here too.
In searching the area you will find that most cities have music in abundance. From Bach to Boston, you will find Orchestras, jazz bands, bell choirs and tribute bands around everywhere. Indoors or outdoors there is most likely something close by. If the outdoors speaks to you and you cannot find a band, pack a picnic basket, choose a park, grab your blanket, chairs & a Bluetooth speaker. Improvise & Enjoy!
FINDING WHAT YOU LOVE TO DO
Finding Awesome Ice Cream
Because, much of what you enjoy will be available where you go, finding what you like to do will help you establish your normal. With the boxes still needing to be unpacked and living with a sense of unrest, doing what you love is an imperative.
It is in doing what you love in the midst of the chaos, that will bring a sense of peace. Fun will seem like a luxury you have no time for. But the pressure of settling EVERYTHING, is overwhelming and therefore needs to be tackled in chunks. In between, creating that sense of fun for everyone cuts the pressure and strengthens those relationships.
So go ahead, take a moment to sign the kids up for soccer. Wander off to a local festival for a few hours. Explore the restaurants around and dedicate time to get to know where you are. Afterwards, you will find the energy to unpack another box.
So How do you find these amazing things to do? See our next blog
#relocation #relomoms #relocationfamilies